Hammer and A Nail

The indigo girls told me to get a hammer and a nail. So i did just that. With both hammer and nail in my hand i stared at my text books and list of assignments and nothing happened. I tried beating the books with the hammer but that just dented the cover. I tried scratching the nail in my list but that just tore the paper into little pieces. I then tried nailing the paper to the table but now i need to get a new notebook and table. So i put the hammer down and grabbed a new piece of paper and a pencil and started studding. This was much more effecitve at getting stuff done. Good try girls. I'll attempt your method again when i need to build a house or something. I think that will be a better use of both tools.

Anticipation

March is a bastard. He will trick you with sunshine and breezes that sing of summer sunshine. When in reality the night brings in frosts and a reminder that you still live in a Midwestern state. The brown-gray grass, that smells of mud and moving water, changes at a snails pace to gray green to small patches of brilliant emerald. But trees and shrubs still hold on to their winter apparel. I can’t help but feel the heavy anticipation for the appearance of buds on the maple trees or the maroon beginnings of lilac blossoms. Last years perennials lay in winter-worn dried out clumps. The salvia whose rich green and purple flowers are now a mass of gray twigs and dusty leaves. If I was to be having a garden this year there would be plenty of broccoli, tomato, pepper and egg plant seedlings under the light table now. But my parents passion for vegetable gardening is much less than mine, as is many peoples; so the full spectrum lights will not make there debut to my room this year. In stead of the pallets of dirt and seed, all I will have this March is a small container with aconite, just taken out of the simulated winter within the refrigerator. Hope fully by May or June a seedling or two will sprout.

Signs of hope are everywhere. Even though the skies may be clouded over in a steely gray sheet, the powerful sun breaks through in the late afternoons and in the evenings casting a violent band of hot pinks, vibrant yellows, and intense reds across the western horizons. This light brings the end of snow banks and stimulates the growth of the new year to begin. Strawberries poke their three lobbed leaves though the hay layer of last fall. The yarrow and yucca are already bright green. The gray stems of last years flowers towering over head the new growth call me to grab the garden clippers and start the annual perennial trimming. Covering the kitchen scraps in this years’ compost pile goes old growth and a few handfuls of water logged leaves from the ground. The apples that weren’t collected and left to rot on the floor over winter now have rings of mold holding them to the ground. These get chucked down the hill where all undesirable compost goes to decay.

Irises all ready have six inches of green blade like leaves above the ground. Not sure the delphinium and columbine made it though the winter. It’ll be a couple weeks before I will know for sure. I planted both last year. One was bough off a discount table in the back corner of a Home Depot Garden Center. It was 5 dollars and only had a few leaves, reminiscent of grape vine foliage. Of course my ‘Charlie Brown’ complex wouldn’t let me leave the store without some overwhelming sense of guilt, if not passive murder, if I did not give this plant a fighting chance. But now with the return of spring, Jack Frost might have done the job that my neglect could have done 6 months earlier. The words of Barbara Kingslover come to mind with “Hope is a renewable resource”. Of course the frosted mornings and wind swept nights diminish the hope I have for warmer weather. But the days getting brighter and greener everyday, it is a constant refilling of hope for morning glory blooms, sweet corn, savory tomatoes, and drinks around a bon fire with friends and family.

February

*Work in progress*

It’s mid February here and though the days are bright and the sun melts the edges of snow banks 8 feet tall, the wind is bitter cold as ever. The Full Snow Moon lights my way as I walk back to my on campus apartment. I know that here in Duluth it is suppose to be cold now, but as a botanist and a one who doesn’t care for foot wear, I’m getting a bit sick of the cold and wish for more photosynthesis in my place of dwelling

I long for the late days of April when the trees are budding and the grass give off the cold musty smell right after a few days of clouds and rain. The bold colors of tulips, daffodils and crocus play on a backdrop of sage green prairie grass in my reoccurring dreams. The first tender leaves of salad and fresh mozzarella, home made of course, with sprigs of borage with its cucumber like taste makes a light, fresh, and sweetly orgasmic meal. The creeks run full and fast with the melting snow and I sit besides them as tiny insects dance in the waters. The spiral grass homes the wasps whom will soon take to the skies and make their papery nests among the trees. Birds sing love songs with the returning sun and by Beltane will have made nests with their companions. I sit among my brothers and sisters and revel in the turning of the earth. Crow sits among the high branches and draws my attention to the world above. The great blue sky, so open, so vast, sprawls from horizon to horizon; encompassing all half of the cosmosphere. Feathery clouds dissipate into the azure.

Underworld Insence

2 parts Sandalwood
1 part Myrrh (Opoponax)
1/4 part Frankincense
1/2 part dried Cypress

Blend on the night of the new moon and let sit for a month.

Morning Light

This poem kind of came to me when I was walking to physics last Monday.

Morning Light by Charles Grabuski

Morning light shines through frosted windows.
Setting fire to coffee mugs and sleepy eyes.
Rising above gilded waters,
dancing through jeweled leaves,
precious moments of placid intensity.
Clear skies like sheets of precious metal,
let me fall into October breeze.
Naked ancestors cling to their summer skins,
made into rubies by autumn air.
Pulling my big sweater closer
and one more sip of steaming coffee.
I'm physically cold, body chilled,
but spiritually warmed, naturally renewed,
by constant and forever gifts of Grandfather Sun.

10-19-2008

Autumn Euforia

I just can't help it any more. I must express the way the Fall makes me feel. It is such an assault on my senses. The changing visual experience, the multitude of aromas, the final fruits of the season, and the wonderful chill of the outdoors. There's something distinctly 'fall' about walking around outside, and seeing the wonderful contrast between the evergreens and the on-fire colors of the oak, birch, and maple trees. Sun set yellows, flaming oranges, ruby reds, and finally earth browns hang from trees like tiny flames. They fall in gentle cascades with each chilling breeze. I bring my faded green jacket closer to me as the sounds of the seasons play in my head. Possession, Pathway of Thorns, and Fear all by Sarah McLachlan all remind me of autumn. Some Brandi Carlile and some Damien Rice on the cloudy days. Butterfly Boucher and Nickle Creek on the cold sunny ones. It wonderful to walk in the ever changing woods and listen to the music and the trees.

The tastes of fall are even more delicious than the sounds. Minnesota apples are now in season and Honey Crisp are the best out of all of them. Hybrid by nature their sugary flavor blends so well with it's crispy flesh. The Honey Crisp's parents are the Macoun form Canada and the Honeygold, another hybrid. The Honey Crisp are by far the pinnacle of apple genetics. Great for eating or baking. It's no wonder I just payed $10 for one bag. They'll get cheaper once they've come into the peck of their season, about mid October thru November.

I love the fact how connected to nature we still are. The colors of fall are all those found in our foods and in our surroundings. The trees, the gourds, the candy, the pies. Mum... pies. Mom will be making pumpkin pies soon. Once when Mom was making a pumpkin pie I asked if the batter was any good. She said no but of course her answer wouldn't be enough for me. So I took the empty mixing bowl and scrapped my finger along the side. The thick orange-ocher batter clung to my finger. It smelled of cinnamon, nutmeg, and all spice. I licked it from my finger and soon regretted the decision. Not Good. Just as mom said. When your mom tells you something is bad, listen to her.

Halloween and Thanksgiving are just around the corner. So are mid-terms. And while I anticipate these joyous and not so joyous events I will consume myself among the senses and traditions of Autumn. I will wade myself among the piles of dead leaves and inhale the cool, spicy night air. I invite you to come and indulge in all that this season has to offer.

Blessed Be.

~CHUCK

Lilith

I have always wanted to write about each season and now that the leaves have just started to turn colors I feel that It's time for me to write about Fall. But I'll wait i week or two to write about autumn cause the leaves have not yet begun to... well fall. So instead i will tell the story of a woman scorned. Her name is Lilith. She is considered to be the first wife of Adam by ancient Jewish texts. She was also said to created before Adam. That being said...

"Creator took the soft earth, mixed it with the rains, and formed the first. She was named Lilith and Creator told her that she was to bring spirit to all things in the universe. So she walked the earth and spoke to the trees, the rocks, the rivers. She told stories to the bothers and sisters of the air, earth, and sea. And when she was done and everything was endowed with spirit, she looked at the world and saw that all the creatures were wild and full of chaos. She turned to Creator and asked "Why did you have me bring spirit to all of these beings only to make them wild and uncontrollable."

From that Creator took the hard clay, the raging oceans, and made the second. He was named Adam. Creator told Adam to tame and rule over all things wild. And that he did. And for a time their was peace.

When Lilith met Adam she saw what the other creatures of the land did and fell to the same urges. But when Adam went to place himself on top of her, she stopped him. He was confused and angry. But she exclaimed that because they were made from the same things that they should make love as equals. But Adam did not agree. He said that Creator told him it was for him to rule and dominate over all things wild. And when he went to lay on top of her again she pushed him away saying that if he was to not see her as an equal, then they would never share the same bed.

And with that she called to Owl. Owl took Lilith away from Adam and flew to a mountain cave where she could watch and wait for Adam to change his ways. Adam asked Creator to retrieve Lilith and Creator sent three spirits to find her. They came to her in the mountain and said that if she wasn't to return to Adam then they would cause the mountain to fall upon her. She replied saying that the only way she would return is if Adam would see her as an equal for they are both made from earth and water.

The spirits went to Adam and told them of Lilith's request. He declined. The spirits returned to Lilith's cave but found it empty. She had seen Adam's refusal of equality and asked for Owl to take her into the night sky. Adam looked to the darkened night sky and saw Lilith fly into the clouds. Lighting flashed and thunder roared and it begin to rain for Lilith was crying tears of sorrow. Adam was sad as well, but not for Lilith, but because he was now alone.

Creator saw that Adam was sad and said it was not good for Adam to be alone. So he gathered more earth, and more water, breathed life into it and made Eve. Creator gave Eve no instructions but told her the story of Adam and Lilith. Eve took pity on Adam and slept with him."

And there is the story of Lilith, as seen by me. True or not, it's a story. Can you tell I'm a feminist. There are many myths revolving around Lilith, but they all depict her as strong and free willed. So next time you see a woman defiled, a woman trading in what she belives is right, treated unfairly because of sex, think of Lilith and remember her tale. Even though Lilith is now alone, she can still be found in every girl defining gender roles, in women fighting for equal pay, in people fighting for choice. In everyone knowing that everyone, man or woman, is equal and deserves to treated as such.

~CHUCK